Hospital Visits
When You Have to Visit the Hospital​
Ironically I am writing this from of all places, the hospital. I am cold, miss my wife and dog. I wonder what is going to happen next, but I know they hold the keys to my cure. I have fought to get into this hospital for four years. They are the best and I feel blessed to be here.
This will be my fourth visit related to my condition or the fifth? Regardless I've spent a lot of time in the hospital. One time I spent nearly two months in the hospital and nearly lost my life. I only say this so you know I know what I'm talking about from my first hand experience. I always feel blessed each time I get to leave. As least I get to leave. Feel the sunshine. Breathe fresh air and have freedom. Not have to ask to go to the bathroom. Not to be able to shower. You do lose your freedom and for good reason. They are trying to return your health and see you be discharged. Remember this is their goal and the more your cooperate. Everyone wins. OK I'm done preaching. So I have some experience in this area and unfortunately hospital stays are not just related to my epilepsy because with chronic conditions you'll find that it touches multiple places within your body and in some cases your mind. For example, my epilepsy has indirectly touched other regions of my body and organs. It can be a domino effect. The most common way it touches your mind is the "I can do that" syndrome which leads to a series of cascading events which then leads to a hospital visit. More on that later.​
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There are also direct connections between your condition and a hospital visit. Just last Saturday I had a seizure. Took a rest on my favorite couch and had another seizure or simply rolled over in a seizure produced "brain fog" and then WHAM I fell directly onto the floor had another seizure, soiled my favorite carpet which ruined it and 911 was called. Fortunately, that did not produce a lengthy hospital visit despite the emergency room doctor suggesting an overnight stay. This decision came from other hospital visits which I will outline later and is not recommended, listen to the medical professionals and not my unique experience. However, hitting your head on concrete is producing a visit to the hospital for the next week for monitoring and testing. It's that simple. One issue leads to another and then another and you can easily end up in the hospital. To be candid this effects not just you, but your entire family who grow weary with the threat of another visit to the hospital. It's never ending and it hurts and can wear them out. Never forget your issue effects the entire family, not just you. So always be gentle and appreciative of yourself, but ALWAYS of them. More on this later.
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ALWAYS Be Respectful and Courteous to the Medical Team
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Hospital employees are often overworked and underpaid so take time to appreciate them. Truly care for them and all that they do to care for you. This is also a good reminder that you are not in a hotel and they are not here to serve you at your beckon call. They have multiple patients to serve and records to update. So don't expect them to come when you anticipate you might have a need. Give them time to respond.
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Take Time to Think/Use your brain Not Just Watch TV.
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Sure you can look at hospital time to just relax and watch TV, but I have found it a great time to also think about your condition, life, family, and things you want to achieve. In other words, turn it into a positive and think about life and what you want to achieve moving forward. What would life be like if your condition was resolved? What are your dreams? What are your aspirations? If nothing else spend time to work on puzzles. The flip side is be careful not to dwell on things or your health challenges. It is a real balancing act which is why I find that you can leave a stronger person.
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Expect Nothing. Appreciate Everything.
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I am someone that operates on expectations. Expectations of myself, my life, my diagnosis and condition, and my future. I love predicability which is why I sometimes feel that my condition is being used as a tool to help mold me into a better person. I have to face those things I can't control or that are not clear, face them myself, but communicate them to others. Being in a hospital makes me appreciate the little things in life and to stop and think. For me, if I don't do it I'm note sure how I would survive let alone believe in my future.
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Face Your Demons and Look Upwards.
I wrote "I am someone that operates on expectations" just as the doctor and his team walked into my room. Their was a team of nearly 10 of them and they had news I wasn't expecting. Quite the opposite. It was a punch in the gut and was a 180-degree turn from what he said yesterday and how things appeared. However, the data is still being flushed out and it could turn my life upside down or the other way around. What does it mean? What does it imply? All my fears are knocking at the door and like it or not I have to face it, trust God, and trust He'll work it out. It raises more questions than answers and ones you can only answer by faith and trust in Him.
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Not what you were looking for? This is a tough one and one that has no easy answers or ones that will make you feel good. This is what is the most tough for me, but this is life and this is part of living with a disability. You can check the easy answers at the door.
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